Ode To Friendship
And author Anais Nin put it beautifully when she said, “Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.”
Though some natural loners are happy without friends, most of us depend greatly on the company of true friends. As with any relationship, friendships bring support and joy and occasionally strife.
When someone embodies the rules — instinctually — their friendships are abundant indeed. And in all my life, I have a handful of great friends, majority are guys and a few women — who have been there for me through thick and thin in my adult life.
I am not really good of having women as my best friends. My poor track record was a proof that having loyal and trustworthy girlfriends isn’t really my forte.
Hat off to this exceptional women and men. For their ability to be my great friends throughout, from my wonderful moments to times of my lousy breakups. Somehow these people, at different time in my life, know when to listen and make sympathetic sounds, when to act good and outraged at your ex’s bad behavior, when to give you a hug, and when to tell you to stop obsessing and enjoy a glass of ice lemon tea. They know when to offer you their couch. Honestly, I am not an easy person to be with.
If closeness forms the basis of friendship, it stands to reason that your best friend would be someone with whom you enjoy supersized intimacy. If I confide that money is tight or my boyfriend’s in the doghouse or give a blow-by-blow of the dramathon that led to the boyfriend’s became ex. We have with our best friends a “beyond-the-call-of-duty” expectation. If we suffer an emergency—real or imagined—and need to talk, we expect our best friend to drop everything and race to our side.
From young adulthood onward, our notion of what makes a good friendship changes very little, but our capacity to maintain one does. It’s a poignant reality; we know what it means to be and have friends, but with the life journey with curve balls being thrown at us from time to time, we’re often unable to muster the time and energy to maintain friendships we profess to value.
Fortunately, studies show that physical proximity has little effect on the ability to keep a friendship in working order. Moving to another state is not the friendship death knell it once was, thanks to the Web. Between e-mail and cell phones with free long distance, we’re able to stay close. Maintaining a lively e-mail correspondence may often be as good as being there.
Now at the Internet age, friendship can be formed in virtual world. Regardless, whether your initial contact was through it’s corporate contacts on the job or support site, or Pinterest site, you can generally be sure of one thing — shared interests.
More and more of us are developing online friendship and it’s not too hard to understand how these relationships grow.
I would love more than anything to be there (online and on the phone) if my friend needs me to talk to in the wee hours in the morning.
Despite the huge geographical distance between us, I would be worried if I don’t hear from them after a short period of time, and vice versa.
Seriously, how much closer could we get to someone than to sit with them each evening over a cup of coffee or tea, glass of wine, or that particular I-wouldn’t-want-to-mention-flavoured popcorn – in your own home, no less!
Whether you carry your virtual social support network around in your pocket via your smart phone or hang out at Starbucks via your laptop, these wireless connections reflect the friendship building block basics regardless of how geographically divergent your paths might be… A